Music Again
by Tachi-Machi
Summary: Tatsuha will do anything to make Ryuichi fall in love with him. How far is the teen willing to go? TatsxRyu
1. California, Rest in Peace

-Music Again-

"Nittle Grasper." That name was on the mind of every teenager in Japan, when they were together. The synthetic-pop band was even massively popular overseas; especially when, after they broke up, Ryuichi Sakuma struck out for a solo career in the States. Ryuichi was the lead vocalist in Grasper, with hundreds of thousands, no, _millions,_ of fans. Tatsuha Uesugi, though only fourteen and the son of a monk, was no exception to the craze…

-Chapter One/California, Rest in Peace-

"TATSUHA! Get your ass down here!" A woman's voice echoed through the Uesugi's traditional Japanese-style home, making everyone, including TATSUHA, wince. Ignoring it, the boy turned up his Nittle Grasper CD, drowning out his sister. _"Help me, somebody help me…"_ Tatsuha sighed dreamily. If he'd been standing, Ryuichi's satiny voice would have made him weak in the knees. Last year, while he'd been downtown with his older brother, Eiri, he'd heard this song. Tatsuha treasured that moment; it was when he'd fallen in love with Ryuichi Sakuma.

The song "Be There" obviously held a place in many Japanese hearts because it was Grasper's breakout hit, but to Tatsuha it held special meaning. In honor of his Naoki award, _Cool Magazine_ gave Eiri several tickets to the sold-out Nittle Grasper concert in Kyoto. This was the kick-off to their second Japanese tour, so they were packed. Mika, Tatsuha's sister, was married to Tohma Seguchi, Grasper's lead synth player, so she, naturally, was there with her ticket. Mika had to trick her brother's into coming, because neither was really into music. But once Tatsuha saw Ryuichi onstage, his heart was struck. The older man's beautiful voice had stopped his sour thoughts cold. Even Yuki's face got softer.

"_But if you think I'm your burden…" _The young Tatsuha was enraptured completely. They were in the front row, and Ryuichi waved to Mika after recognizing his keyboardist's wife. His eyes scanned the front row, and the singer smiled sweetly at Tatsuha, who was staring with his mouth agape. The girl next to him squealed loudly. "Eeeeee~! Ryu-chan smiled at you, kid! Here, I took this…" The chick handed him a snapshot of Ryuichi; the same smile that he'd given Tatsuha was on his lips. The boy huffed, acting like he didn't care, and shoved it in his jeans pocket. But inside, he bubbled with excitement. This was when his obsession started…

Suddenly, Tatsuha's door burst open, and Mika stormed in, her expression fierce. "Tatsuha! Dad's going to the temple; he wants you with him… ugh! Put this crap up! Aren't you over Sakuma?" She yanked his headphones off, and Tatsuha pouted. "No. You know that. Sis, why can't you get Seguchi-san to introduce us?" "Because. Grasper is going through some times, kid. Now, go meet Dad, 'Mr. Monk-in-Training.'"

The hard times that Mika had mentioned… the band broke up within the year. Tatsuha was heartbroken because Ryu took his career overseas, and with him went any chance of Tatsuha meeting him. But, a year later, Yuki met Shuichi. Tatsuha was a little jealous. After all, the older boy looked a lot like Grasper's old lead singer. So you can imagine Tatsuha's excitement when he heard that Ryuichi was back in Japan, and Nittle Grasper was reuniting. Of course, when he heard from Ayaka that Shuichi had sang with Ryuichi, he'd been angry, but all was well. After all, that night was the first night that Tatsuha met his love, Ryuichi Sakuma, in the flesh.

"Ha, Tatsuha, you idiot. If you wanted to see Sakuma-san you shoulda just told me! I would have gotten Tohma to introduce you." "You're such a liar, Mika…" In a Shibuya nightclub, the four, Mika, Tatsuha, Noriko, and Shuichi made their way to a table where Tohma Seguchi and Ryuichi were chatting. Tatsuha's heart skipped a beat. Finally, he was meeting his crush. "Hi, Saku-" Shuichi was shoved out of the way as Tatsuha leaned forward, getting to Ryuichi first. "H-hello, Sakuma-san… I'm a big fan of yours_." 'Eee~! He's so amazingly cool! 3' _Ryuichi glanced over, smiling. At first, Tatsuha thought he recognized him, but the older man cocked his head, "Hello. Who are you? Do you want an autograph, na noda?"

Mika pinched her brother's cheek. "Sakuma, this is Tatsuha, my little brother. Please excuse him." "Aaaagh…" Shuichi pushed himself off the club's floor with a groan, ignoring his spinning head. "Ah! It's nice to meet you, Tatsuha-kun!3 It makes me happy to hear you like our music." Tatsuha blushed. "Oh… of course. Um, I was at your Kyoto concert two years ago…" "Shuichi? Is that you?" Shuichi hobbled over, waving. "H-hello, Sakuma-san…" "Hi! How have you been, buddy?" Tatsuha stared enviously as the other men talked. _'….Wow. They're just buddies… Shuichi, I'm so jealous…'_

"How is California, Sakuma-san? Can you speak English well?" Ryuichi clapped his hands at Tatsuha's questions. "Of course I can! In fact, I'm really good at it, Tatsuha-kun." "Wow, you're so talented! If the whole world had just a fraction of your talent, Sakuma-san, we'd be a world of scholars, doctors, and amazing singers." Tatsuha praised, and Ryuichi smiled. "Thank you, Tatsuha-kun. But I'm not all that talented. I can't write Hiragana!" The man laughed, and Tatsuha slapped the table dramatically. "That's okay, Sakuma-san! We all have our weaknesses! I myself have trouble with Hiragana! It's nothing like Kanji!" "Ha ha. You're funny, Tatsuha-kun."

Shuichi rolled his eyes. He knew of Tatsuha's love for Ryuichi, but figured it was just a fan's crush. Sure, he himself had once been in 'love' with Ryuichi, but once he met Yuki and got signed to NG, those feelings quickly dissipated. After all, their bands were going to be competing for number one on the billboards. "Is California anything like Kyoto? I hear America is pretty liberal." "Oh! Tatsuha-kun, you mentioned something about Kyoto… what were you saying?" Tatsuha smirked. "Okay, I get the drift. You don't want to talk about California, huh?" Ryuichi looked surprised.

Reaching under the table, he yanked up a pink bunny and chunked it at Tatsuha. "There! Attack; Kumagoro Miracle Beam!" _'Omigod! He's so cute!3 I don't care if he's an idiot…' _Noriko pounded on the table. "Ryu! What the hell? Quit being an ass!" Ryuichi timidly apologized, while Tatsuha fantasized. _'Oh, how cruel! It's always the pretty ones. Too bad everyone is here… heh heh…' _"Oh, um… Tatsuha-kun! Are you feeling unwell, na noda?" "How sweet of you to notice, Sakuma-san! Why, yes, I feel faint…" Tatsuha, who had stood up, dramatically wobbled. "Eep! Oh, I'm sorry! It was my bunny attack… Here, let me walk you to your car…" "I hope you don't mind if I lean on you…" _'Eee~! We're touching!' _As Ryuichi led the younger boy out, the four resumed conversation, trying to cram as much as possible in before two certain idiots returned…

"Um, here you go, Tatsuha-kun. Careful!" Tatsuha slid into the backseat, reluctantly letting go of Ryuichi. "Wow, I don't know my own strength, na noda!" The man seemed a little prideful, despite being convinced he almost knocked Tatsuha out. The monk smiled. "I'm sorry, to burden you, Sakuma-san… Um, would you mind…?" Tatsuha gestured to the seat beside him, and Ryuichi plopped in, shutting the car door. "I'm glad you're not some crazy fan, Tatsuha-kun! Now we can be friends!" Ryuichi misinterpreted (somehow) the love-struck, lusty, I-want-to-jump-your-bones-look that Tatsuha was giving him at the mere mentioning of being friends, and flailed his arms.

"Oh, it's not like I _don't_ like the fans, na noda! It's just nice not to get cameras and microphones shoved against your friend, ya know? It's kinda annoying. I actually… don't have many friends that don't." The man fingered Kumagoro's red bow, frowning. Tatsuha's heart flipped.

"No way. Sakuma-san, those people aren't your friends. They only care about a big scoop. Wouldn't you rather have just a few good friends like Noriko-san and Seguchi-san than a bunch of fakers who just act like a friend?" Ryuichi stared at Tatsuha incredulously. "Tatsuha-kun…" "And," Tatsuha twiddled his thumbs, "…Well… that's why I'd like to be your friend, Sakuma-san." If Mika would have been there, she'd have clapped and said what a good actor he was. But Tatsuha _wasn't_ lying, and Ryuichi could tell.

The singer jumped up and down in his seat. "Really? Wow, Tatsuha-kun! Yeah, let's be friends. Maybe we'll even be fast best friends, like me and Tohma!" Ryuichi chattered on, and Tatsuha smiled indulgently. "I'd like that." "Yaaaay~! We did it, Kumagoro! Another friend!" Tatsuha swayed back and forth as Ryuichi started jumping again. "His name's Kumagoro? How cute." Ryu smiled happily.

"Uh-huh. Tatsuha-kun, call me Ryuichi, 'kay? Too bad you can't really call me 'Ryuichi-kun', though. I'm such an old man!" Ryuichi laughed, and Tatsuha blushed. _'Really…? By his first name?' _The monk couldn't believe his ears; they were friends! Tatsuha Uesugi and Ryuichi Sakuma! Tatsuha felt like flying. It took all self-control not to start stripping the older man, and then throw him down. "What? Nonsense… Ryuichi…! You're not old! And even if you were, I'm sure you'd still look as gorgeous as always! Besides, I'm sure you still have some tricks up your sleeves." Tatsuha winked, but Ryuichi, totally oblivious to the sixteen-year-old monk hitting on him, simply smiled.

"Thank you, Tatsuha-kun. You're so nice, na noda." The monk nearly fainted. _'He thinks I'm nice!~3 Eee~!' _Ryuichi frowned, leaning closer. "Um, T-Tatsuha-kun… are you okay?" He asked worriedly, and Tatsuha smirked wolfishly. "Ryuichi… How long were they staying in the bar?" Ryuichi tapped his chin, tilting his head to the side. "Ummm… I dunno. Tohma said something, but… why? You wanna go back in?" Tatsuha shifted.

"Actually… oh! Suddenly, I feel dizzy… Ryuichi-san, I'm sorry, but…" Tatsuha shuddered, and with a dramatic flourish, he fell, his head conveniently landing in Ryuichi's lap. "Eeeep~! Um, Tatsuha-kun! What's wrong?" "…I'm not sure, Ryuichi-san… I'm sorry, but do you mind if I rest like this…?" Now, Tatsuha was fine, but Ryuichi didn't know that. The older man stared at Tatsuha's head, finally saying "alright" with a little sigh.

After a few moments, Tatsuha muttered quietly, "Wow… I can't believe this." Ryuichi leaned over. "Huh? What was that, Tatsuha-kun?" The monk stared at the seat in front of him, circling a finger on Ryuichi's kneecap. "Well… you know." He began, "I mean, it's like… _It's Ryuichi Sakuma._ My idol. It's pretty cool." Ryuichi stared. "Hmm… Oh! Tatsuha-kun! We should totally hang out sometimes!" The man stopped. "Um… I mean, you know, if you want to …" Tatsuha stared up at Ryuichi.

"…Really?" The older man smiled. "Sure! Maybe we can go see Shuichi, or… Oh! I want to go to a zoo, Tatsuha-kun! Let's do that, na noda!" The young monk sat up, and scooted right up against Ryuichi. "That sounds great, Ryuichi. And… I'd love to show you my house. I live in Kyoto." Ryuichi glanced up, blinking. He felt a bit uncomfortable. "Really? Hm…A few years back, Tohma insisted that we did our tour kickoff there…"

"Hey! Tatsuha, you little shit! Don't you be shagging Sakuma in my car!" Tatsuha's head snapped up at his sister's voice. Mika, who had opened the door, was glaring at him. Tohma was beside her. "Now, now, darling… calm down…" Ryuichi's face lit up. "Tohma! Are you guys done? Huh?" He jumped up, out of the car, and threw his arms around his old keyboardist's neck. Tohma smiled. "Yes, Ryuichi. Here comes Noriko and Shindou-san now." Tatsuha stared after Ryuichi as he bounced over to Shuichi.

"Sakuma-san, are you riding with Seguchi-san?" "Uh-huh! I'm staying in Tokyo, na noda." "Well, Mika-san… can I get a ride?" "Sure, kid. To Eiri's, right?" "Ha… ha ha ha…" Tatsuha wished that he had his motorcycle to take Ryuichi home. Instead, he'd be going home with Mika, to his regular old life of getting high, sex, and false priesthood. To the life his father thought he had. "Tatsuha-san? …Are you alright? You look pale…" Tohma was staring, and Ryuichi brightened. "Tohma, Tatsuha-kun and I are friends now! Aren't we?" The singer grabbed Tatsuha's hands and danced around.

The young monk sat a hand on top of Ryuichi's head, smiling softly. "Looks like it." Tohma watched with interest, and pulled Tatsuha to the side. "Huh-" "Tatsuha-san… how would you like to chaperone Ryuichi-san to the zoo?" All kinds of things ran through Tatsuha's head. "Um! O-of course! I'd love to!" Tohma smiled. "I thought so. I'll arrange that. How about Saturday?" Tatsuha looked confused.

"Seguchi… why?" Tohma flashed an angelic smile. "Because. Ryuichi seemed pretty excited." "Heeeey~! Tohma~! Whatcha talking about?" Ryuichi asked loudly, waggling Kumagoro in Tohma's face. "Well…" Tohma began, "…I was organizing a surprise with Tatsuha-san, for you." With a whoop, Ryuichi jumped up and down. "Really? Yay! What is it? Huh?" The singer jumped all over Tohma, demanding an answer.

Tohma laughed. "It's a surprise." Ryuichi, having failed to worm an answer out of his best friend, shuffled over to Tatsuha. The man put on a cute face before begging, "Tatsuha-kun… Please tell me!" The older man was so cute, it made Tatsuha want to tease him. "Sorry, Ryuichi-san. Heh, you're so cute." Ryuichi huffed. "I hate you, Tatsuha-kun!" He said angrily, turning away. _'D'awww….' _Tatsuha blushed deeply, while Tohma made sure Ryuichi knew that it was only a few days away.

Mika clapped her hands, "Okay, guys! I'm ready to get home. Let's go." While she told Noriko goodbye, Ryuichi pestered Tohma for details of Saturday's excursion. Tatsuha was watching as Ryuichi suddenly brightened, nodded, and trotted over. The vocalist tugged lightly on Tatsuha's sleeve with a sneaky smile, and Kumagoro was inching up his arm. Ryuichi removed his bunny, stood up on his toes, and whispered in Tatsuha's ear. It wasn't the usual cutesy front, either. The voice, which was like honey to Tatsuha's ears, sounded like Grasper's Sakuma. It sent a violent shiver up Tatsuha's spine.

"I'll see you Saturday, Tatsuha. I can't wait to see where you'll take me." Ryuichi held their gaze for a second longer than he should have, and as soon as it had come, the older man's confident demeanor disappeared. "I'm sure we'll have fun, Tatsuha-kun! Um… we'll talk later, na noda!~" Ryuichi bounced back to Tohma's Jaguar, a big smile on his pretty face. Tohma cast his brother-in-law a smirk; the priest was cradling the ear his idol had huskily whispered into. It seemed that, like Eiri, Tatsuha's ears were his weak spot.


	2. Breaking Outta This TwoStar Town

-Chapter Two/Breaking Outta This Two-star town—

Saturday couldn't come quickly enough for Tatsuha. He was a little bummed that he and _Ryuichi Sakuma_ were merely going to the zoo, but hell. He'd take what he could get; right about now, Tatsuha would go with his idol to the grocery store. So now, Tatsuha Uesugi was standing in front of Kyoto's small zoo, looking for the black van which Tohma promised held Ryuichi. The monk, while waiting, daydreamed.

_After a long day of frolicking on their date, Ryuichi brought Tatsuha home. "Tatsuha-kun! Let's order some tempura!" Says Ryu, flipping through a phonebook. "Of course, Ryuichi. Whatever you'd like is fine with me." Nittle Grasper's singer looks away, a big blush on his pale cheeks. "Tatsuha… I've had a lot of fun today, and I was curious… would you like to stay the night? Here?" Tatsuha stares, and jumps up dramatically. "O-of course, Ryuichi! Thank you!" "Oh, Tatsuha-kun… 3"_

–SCREEEEE~!- A squealing of tires jolted Tatsuha out of his reverie, and a black van pulled up, erratically pulling in to park in front of him. Tatsuha could only stare in shock as the backdoor slid open, and Ryuichi Sakuma stepped out… in half of a bunny costume. His chocolate eyes lit up at the sight of Tatsuha.

"Hey, Tatsuha-kun!3 What's up? You ready to rock?" "Uh… S-sure, Ryuichi…" Was all that Tatsuha could manage. _'What the hell is this…?' _The monk noticed something in Ryuichi's arm, but the older man stalked forward, throwing his arms and h-er, paws, around Tatsuha. "I've been so excited, na noda! I couldn't even sleep! We should see the pandas first, Tatsuha-kun…" Nittle Grasper's singer pulled Tatsuha towards the entrance, flourishing a hat. With ears on the top. "Hey, Tatsuha-kun, look. I brought you a costume, too, so you wouldn't feel left out! Do you like bears, Tatsuha-kun?" "What? Oh, yeah! I love bears! You're so thoughtful, Ryuichi…" Once Tatsuha had slipped on the costume, the two were ready to boogie.

"Wow, Tatsuha-kun! Wasn't that cool? Baby pandas are so cute! Oh, and I like…" As Ryuichi rambled on, Tatsuha was lost in ecstasy. Neither noticed a group of young mothers staring as Ryuichi pulled his new friend behind him, towards an ice cream stand. The singer was never one to resist ice cream.

"So, Ryuichi? Which flavor?" Tatsuha dug in a back pocket for his wallet while Ryuichi gawked at the long list of ice cream flavors. "Strawberry!" Suddenly, the man looked guilty. "…Tatsuha-kun. You don't have to treat me." Tatsuha looked offended, and shook his head. "You pay? No way. You know, I almost feel like I'm on a date. And I always treat my dates." Tatsuha winked, and Ryuichi smile wide. He liked the younger man. Tatsuha was funny, good-looking, and, most importantly, he treated Ryuichi like a friend, like Tohma or Noriko.

The two sat at a small table, Ryuichi with his back to the crowd so that he could take off his bunny nose and hat. While Tatsuha licked away at his butter pecan ice cream, Ryu chattered about anything and everything. "…So, the girls, they knew it was me! I got chased! I was so scared, na noda! I thought I was gonna get run over. But K ran them away." Tatsuha grinned. "That's one hell of a story!" Ryuichi smiled. "I know! I've got a ton of 'em, na noda." "No… I mean, why would you chase someone you love? And, if you _really_ loved someone, you'd want them to be happy. Some people are so selfish."

Ryuichi stared. This kid… "Oh, Ryuichi, where's Kumagoro-kun?" The singer's face fell. "…I was already in the van when I realized that I forgot him at my house." Ryuichi murmured, and Tatsuha smiled apologetically. "Well, when we're done eating, we can buy a camera, take some pictures. I'm sure he'd be excited if you showed him." Ryuichi bounced up and down excitedly. "You're so smart, Tatsuha-kun! Yeah, let's do that." Ryuichi watched as the monk winced. Tatsuha was staring beyond Ryuichi, so the vocalist turned around. Approaching them was a gorgeous girl, with blonde hair, blue eyes, and a large chest, obviously dressed for anyone who'd look.

When she came close enough, she flipped her long hair, cherry-red lips forming a smile. "Hi." Tatsuha merely smiled in response, being polite. If he weren't with Ryuichi, Tatsuha would invite her to sit, and he'd flirt. But no one, especially just some dressed-up bimbo, could compare to his idol. Ryuichi hung his head a little, hoping she wouldn't recognize him. "I've been watching you, and you look so much like Eiri Yuki! I love his books, and I was curious if you two were related…"

Tatsuha shook his head with a smile. "Yuki? No, I'm afraid you're mistaken. I'm always told that I do, though." "Uh-huh!3 You look so much alike…" She leaned close to Tatsuha's face, making Ryuichi shift. Ryuichi knew it was none of his business, but when that woman brushed some of Tatsuha's bangs aside to 'look at his eyes,' something in him snapped.

Ryuichi looked up, chewing the last of his cone. "Tatsuha…" The monk's head snapped up; the older man hadn't used the '-kun,' and his voice… "…I'm ready." Tatsuha was confused. He'd never seen Ryuichi act like this. Was Grasper's vocalist… jealous? Tatsuha decided to see if he was. "Okay, hang on. So, sweetheart? What's your name?" _–CRACK.-_ Ryuichi slipped on his hat and mask, wriggling in place. He didn't understand why he felt so… jealous. "Yukiko? That's a nice name. Maybe we can hang out…" Ryuichi stood up briskly, stalked over without a word, and draped his arms around Tatsuha's shoulders. He shot a fierce glare at Yukiko, and the girl flinched.

"Tatsuha, what about our pictures…?" He whispered, squeezing. Tatsuha almost smiled. He stood up, put on his mask, hat, and gloves, and tugged Ryuichi away from the table. Yukiko stared after them, and, obviously victorious, Ryuichi smirked at her. After they left, a realization struck her. "Wait… that guy looked like…"

"Oh… okay… I'll have him right there, Seguchi. I hear you! 'Kay; bye." As Tatsuha hung up, all kinds of loathing, mean things ran through his head. Ryuichi was looking at the capybara, and he was having so much fun that Tatsuha didn't want to disturb him. Nevertheless, Tohma had told him to hurry… "Ryuichi! Seguchi-san just called…" Tatsuha reluctantly called out, and Ryuichi skipped over. "Huh? Tohma? What'd he say, na noda?" "We have to get over to Hit Stage studios, like, right away." "You mean I get to sing? Yay~! But…" Ryuichi looked to Tatsuha, "…We have to leave right now?"

Tatsuha smiled, setting a hand on Ryu's head. "But… Tohma said-" "I know. He screwed up, I guess…" The monk led Ryuichi towards the parking lot. "I don't want to leave, either. But you want to sing, right? So I'll get you there." Ryuichi clapped. "Ohh~! You have a car, Tatsuha-kun?" The monk smirked. "A motorcycle." Ryuichi stared at the bike, surprised, and Tatsuha straddled it.

"Well? Let's roll!" Ryuichi looked uncertain. "But… what if I fall off?" "Just hold on to me. I wouldn't let you fall. I'll be really careful, okay? I promise." For a second, Tatsuha thought that Ryuichi would say no and call a chauffeur, but the vocalist nodded, slowly inching his way onto the bike, behind Tatsuha. The monk tossed away his animal costume, revving his engine. Ryuichi, out of reflex, latched onto Tatsuha's middle. As the engine roared and the two lurched forward, Ryuichi buried his face in Tatsuha's neck. He didn't want to look. "Please don't go very fast, Tatsuha-kun!" He pleaded, and Tatsuha, not believing that Ryuichi Sakuma was pressed up against him, could only nod.

The two were on the highway within minutes. It was about a thirty-minute ride to the studio, and Tatsuha was trying to hurry, but every time he changed lanes or sped up a little to pass someone, Ryuichi yelped, "Tatsuha-kuuun-! Slow down, na noda!" or, "Ohhh, I felt like I was gonna fall off! Careful, Tatsuha-kun!"

People scattered at Uni TV studios as a motorcycle ridden by a sixteen-year-old monk and a multi-platinum selling singer, and the bike drove down a hall to stage seven. "Okay!" The motorcycle crashed through a door, debris flying in all directions, and Ryuichi screamed like a Banshee. "We're here, Ryuichi! You ready?" The vehicle stopped, 'put-put-putting' at the top of the stairs down to the stage. Ryuichi clung like a baby koala would to its mother for a few seconds before noticing a voice. _"But if you think I'm your burden, then I'll say 'so long' and flee…" _"Huh? Ryuichi, looks like you're already on stage…" "Huuuuh? Oh… I am!" Ryuichi squinted. "Wait… that's Shuichi!"

The two got off the bike, leaning over the handrail for a better look. "Who's that…?" "It's not Sakuma." "_Music Fan_? Oh, that special, right?" "He doesn't sound _anything _like Ryuichi. He's pretty cute, though… and cooler." "He is…?" Ryuichi muttered, a fierce look crossing his face. "K-! That's shit! No one is cooler than me! Let me down there!" "Wha- Ryuichi-!" Just as K looked up, Ryuichi came jumping down. "R-Ryuichi!" Tatsuha tried to grab the singer, but was too slow, and only caught air. "Give me your leather and a mic! Hurry!" The staff looked shocked when they noticed Ryuichi, yelling, some in relief, some in disappointment, "It's Sakuma-san!"

After Ryuichi told Shuichi to "beat it," the show quickly picked back up. As Tatsuha watched the show in a daze, he suddenly collapsed weakly, falling to his knees.

"What a show! That was amazing!" "You were great, Sakuma-san!" "Aw, thanks guys! I couldn't do it without you guys." Ryuichi was making his way backstage, surrounded by news reporters and people seeking a magazine interview. Once they started to press in, K brandished his .45, and they scattered. Ryuichi, the adrenaline of the show leaving him, finally remembered Tatsuha. _'I hope he's not angry with me… I didn't even say goodbye…' _Noticing the look on his star's face, K patted him on the head. "Ryuichi, what's with the face? That was a good show!" Ryuichi teared up.

"Tatsuha-kun. I didn't even say goodbye." K frowned. "Oh, that kid you were with? He's still here. Look, here he comes now!" Ryuichi's head snapped up to see Tatsuha making his way towards them. "Tatsuha-kun…" _"You idiot!" _Ryuichi blinked dumbly. It'd been quite awhile since he'd last been talked to like that. Still, Tatsuha continued. "Jumping off a balcony like that… you know you could have gotten hurt, right? What if you had? It would have been all my fault." Ryuichi's face hardened. _'I knew it. He's not my friend. He's just in it for himself.' "_You know… if something happened to you on my account, Ryuichi… I couldn't forgive myself!"

_-Click.- _K was holding his gun to Tatsuha's head. "Speak up, kid! Why are you so friendly with Ryuichi, huh?" "K." The blonde turned to Ryuichi, who was hugging Kumagoro. The singer smiled. "It's okay. Tatsuha-kun is my friend." He quickly walked over to Tatsuha, taking the monk's hand. "You're Kumagoro's friend too, na noda!3 He likes you." Tatsuha smiled, but inside he was thinking, _'I don't care if the damn rabbit plushie likes me, as long as the guy holding hi- IT does.' _K huffed, holstering his weapon. He looked disappointed that he wouldn't be running off some crazy fan. "Tatsuha-kun, let's go. I want to talk."

The two were now sitting in Ryuichi's dressing room, sipping coffee, peering at each other over a table. Tatsuha was the first to speak. "Hey, I'm sorry for blowing up on you. Do you forgive me?" Ryuichi smiled. "Of course! I'm actually really happy. In fact…" He looked away, "…I was worried you'd be angry at me for not saying goodbye. You were only worried if I got hurt, though." The singer beamed. "I'm happy, Tatsuha-kun!" Tatsuha smiled back. He had made his idol happy, and that made _him _happy.

They talked for hours. And K let them, since Ryuichi's schedule was now free for a few days. They talked about everything from chocolate to the biggest celebrities, and Tatsuha was on cloud nine. After Tatsuha told Ryuichi that his father was a monk (he conveniently forgot to mention his part in the clergy himself,) and about where he lived, the older man even told Tatsuha where _he_ lived. Tatsuha made a mental note, just in case. By the time that Ryuichi said he was tired, and left for his house, it was eight-'o-clock. It'd take a little over an hour to get back to Kyoto, so Tatsuha figured he might as well get going. His father had a funeral for him to perform in the morning.

Tatsuha quietly crept into his house, trying desperately not to wake his family up. Mika, since Tohma was in New York, was staying a few days. He'd even cut the engine up the road, walking his motorcycle down the driveway. Even then, when he was about to slide open his bedroom door, his father barked out his name.

"Tatsuha! Where have you been?" The teen took a moment to recover before turning, a shining smile on his face. "Sorry. With a friend in Tokyo. It won't happen again, Dad." He tried to open his door again, but the older monk stopped him. He looked sternly serious. "…Tatsuha, I know you've been sneaking out. What have you been doing? You know of your resp-" "Who told you?" Tatsuha cut in sharply, glaring. His father looked away. "…Your sister cares about you, Tatsuha. Don't think-" "Mika? What the hell? She knew I was with-" "Don't interrupt me! You are a priest, Tatsuha. Never forget that. People look to you for advice, so stop this childish way of life." He straightened, while Tatsuha stared at his socks.

"Your brother… Eiri… he's a failure. I raised you differently, Tatsuha, because you are the only son that can bring honor to this family. When Eiri started going by the name 'Yuki,' I was appalled. But it all turned out for the best! I couldn't imagine if the public got wind that the son of a monk was a homosexual. That Shindo further corrupted my boy, you know. It all really makes me sick." Tatsuha's father shook his bald head, while Tatsuha scratched his nose. A small smile formed on his face. "So… that's what you think of Eiri, eh?"

The older monk looked up. "That's what you say about your own son, just because he's not what you want him to be? Eiri's finally happy. He's kind of… letting go, finally, and you're still unhappy. You're upset that you can't control him." "T-Tatsuha…?" The monk took a step back from his son, not fully understanding. "Well, I'm done! I won't be manipulated anymore, Father…" Tatsuha smirked. "I'll make my own way. I've found something better than my little world here." Tatsuha slid his door open, stepping inside. "Wait! I don't understand… What do you mean, 'something?'" Tatsuha glanced over his shoulder, smiling. "…Enlightenment."


	3. Make Me Shine

**-Chapter Three/Make Me Shine-**

**Tatsuha's father tried to keep him from leaving that night. He tried to take his son's bags from his hands, but the younger monk tied all of his bags to his motorcycle. All reasoning fell on deaf ears. Tatsuha stayed at Yuki's that night, and Shuichi was very sympathetic.**

"**So, um, Tatsuha… Ryuichi told me you guys went to the zoo." Shuichi tried to be light-hearted at the dinner table, but both his boyfriend and Tatsuha ignored him. That "one night, please, bro?" turned into a week, and Yuki was getting pretty testy. The singer gave up with a little sigh, shifting in his chair. Usually the brothers got along, but living under the same roof, with such a clash of wills, was straining the three men. Yuki silently picked at his main course, glaring at his brother, who sat across from him. Tatsuha noticed. "…What's up?" _"'What's up?'"_ Yuki repeated sharply. "You've been staying here a week now. Go home." The former monk set his chopsticks down, and leaned back with a sigh. "…I can't." Shuichi leaned forward. "Why not…?" Tatsuha smirked. "I can't. If I do, I'll go crazy. Look, I'm really sorry, but-" "So you think that you can just stay here? Get a job, you mooch. I hate babysitting brats." Yuki got up with his dishes, shoving in his chair.**

"**Yuki!" Shuichi whined plaintively, putting on those puppy dog eyes. "This is your brother! Be nicer, please!" Yuki snorted. "I don't care. He's not my problem." Shuichi looked to Tatsuha helplessly. He knew, had that comment been directed at himself, it would have stung. But Tatsuha was still smiling. "…Yeah, you're right. I've got somewhere I can try, I guess. Thanks for letting me crash." The teen stood up, and slowly walked for the door. "I'll be back for my shit in a few hours, Eiri." Shuichi cringed as the door slammed, hesitantly casting a glance to his lover. Yuki only lit a cigarette.**

**Tatsuha wandered Eiri's posh neighborhood aimlessly, thinking hard. Eiri was so terrible! Weren't they brothers? Siblings are supposed to do things like letting each other stay when they hit a slump… right? "Goddammit… you're the worst brother ever, Eiri." Tatsuha said dramatically, meaning it as a joke, but stopped walking. He stood under a flickering streetlight, looking up at the darkening sky with hard breaths. "…But I can't hate him. Jackass." Tatsuha glared at the streetlight as if it was its fault that he had no place to go. And then, as he started walking, he heard the most beautiful voice in the world. "Tatsuha-kun? Is that you?" The teen whipped around to face a smiling Ryuichi. "R-Ryuichi-" "Yaaay! I found you, na noda! See how good I am at hide-and-go-seek? It's your turn to 'seek', Tatsuha-kun…" The vocalist was about to skip off before Tatsuha grabbed his shoulder. "Wait! What are you doing here, Ryuichi…?" Ryuichi threw his arms around Tatsuha with a brilliant grin.**

"**Tohma had to go to Yuki-san's house to give Shuichi a schedule! Tohma was taking me home, and then when we stopped, Shuichi told me you left walking!" Ryuichi looked proud of himself. "I knew that you couldn't have gotten far. If you needed a 'seek', you should have just called, Tatsuha-kun. I'm up for a game anytime!" Tatsuha stared at the singer that hung around his neck, and Ryuichi suddenly felt like Tatsuha wasn't playing. "…Tatsuha-kun? Were you even playing hide-and-go-seek? 'Cause you look very serious, like this…" Ryuichi pressed down on his eyebrows, making them furrow, showing Tatsuha what he looked like, "…And it is impossible to look upset when playing, Tatsuha-kun, so you must **_**not**_** be playing, after all!" Ryuichi finally concluded, and Tatsuha smiled. "Pft…" The teen burst into laughter, suddenly forgetting all his troubles. Ryuichi looked confused.**

"**Tatsuha-kun, what's so funny? Are you thinking of a joke, na noda?" Tatsuha waved a hand. "N-no… ha. I was sad, Ryuichi, but you cheered me up." Ryuichi beamed. "I cheered you up, Tatsuha-kun? That's great! I love cheering people up! It makes **_**me**_** happy." Tatsuha nodded. "You're good at it, Ryuichi." They started walking; Ryuichi had a bounce in his step. "But, Tatsuha-kun, why were you so sad? Did somebody yell at you?" Tatsuha shook his head. "No, not really. But… my parents kicked me out." Ryuichi looked up abruptly. "…Really?" Tatsuha glanced down. Ryuichi had that… look again. "…Yeah. My dad doesn't want me living there anymore." Ryuichi stared ahead. The look in his eyes; it was as if he was staring beyond just the street ahead. "…So you have nowhere to go?" He muttered, and Tatsuha sighed, running a hand through his raven locks.**

"**Nope." He smiled quickly. "I might move in with this chick I know. Roommates!" The teen laughed, and Ryuichi stopped walking. When Tatsuha turned to see what was the matter, Ryuichi straightened. "…I have… a lot of rooms. Maybe you can… you know?" Tatsuha almost fainted. Was Ryuichi asking him to move in with him? A dream come true! He fervently agreed, bowing so that he folded in half like a hairpin. "You have no idea how much this means to me, Ryuichi! I'll find a job, so I don't inconvenience you more." The older man chuckled. "Don't worry about money. I have enough to live comfortably, Tatsuha. You just worry about fixing your relationships." Tatsuha shivered. He loved how Ryuichi could go from playing hide-and-go-seek to taking full charge of a problem in a matter of seconds.**

**Once the two arrived at Yuki's place, Tohma came out with an umbrella since it had started to sprinkle. Tatsuha and Ryuichi were on the porch, talking. Tohma gestured to his car as he opened his leopard-print umbrella. "…Would you like me to take you home, Ryuichi?" The singer jumped up from his chair. "Okaaaay! But hang on while Tatsuha-kun gets his things, okay? Thank you, Tohma!" The blonde shot a curious look at the door that Tatsuha went through. But Ryuichi, who was telling Kumagoro that they'd have a new house buddy, looked so happy. Tohma would have to make sure the press didn't find out.**

**Once Tatsuha had loaded his two bags in the trunk, they packed in, grateful to be away from the rain. Within fifteen minutes they were pulling up to Ryuichi's beautiful European-style villa. Tatsuha was amazed that he'd be staying here, with his idol. "Tatsuha-kun! This is my house, na noda. We'll have so much fun. It'll be like a sleepover every night!" Tohma walked them up, holding the umbrella above their damp heads. "Tatsuha…" He whispered once they were inside and Ryuichi ran off to put Kumagoro to bed. Tatsuha's head snapped up. The older man looked fierce. "…You may be my brother-in-law, but I won't allow you to hurt Ryuichi in any way. You break his heart…" Tohma tapped Tatsuha's chest with a daring smirk, "…I'll break your entire reputation. Please remember that." He pulled away with a cherubic smile, leaving Tatsuha to sweat. "I'd never…" "Good. I'm happy to hear that." "Okay, Tatsuha-kun!" Ryuichi bounced back in, waving a blue blanket. "This is one of my blankets; I slept with it for a long time, na noda. But now I'm giving it to you. You better take care of it, 'kay?" Tatsuha took it gingerly from the older man's hands, nodding with a smile. Tohma saluted. "Well, I'm off. Thank you for your help earlier, Ryuichi." He bowed, and Ryuichi waved him off. "Uh-huh. No biggie, Tohma! Tatsuha-kun, look! I've got movies! Do you like movies?…" Tohma shut the front door behind himself with a small smile. It had stopped raining, so the smell of grass was in the air. "…A new beginning. I can't wait to see where this leads us, Tatsuha-san; Ryuichi…"**

"**Hey, Tatsuha-kun? You look bored. You don't like 'The Aristocats?' I love this movie. The black kitten is really cute." Ryuichi smiled at Tatsuha, but the younger man did not smile back. This was the _last_ thing he thought he'd be doing if he ever found himself in Ryuichi's house. Watching a marathon of old American Disney cartoons? How did this happen…? "Yeah, he is cute. Ryuichi…" Tatsuha stopped himself. What the hell was he doing? So what if they only sat and watched Disney movies? **_**'I'm so greedy…' **_**The teen thought, biting his lip as Ryuichi stared at him, processing something. "Oh. Are you tired, Tatsuha-kun? Would you like to go to bed? Because I have a room set up for you. It's right beside mine, na noda! Just in case you ever need me…" The vocalist jumped up from his leather couch, gathering Tatsuha's things in his arms. Tatsuha sighed, lightly touching Ryuichi's forearm. "Ryuichi… it's okay! I'm not tired. Let's watch the rest of your movie." Ryuichi looked amazed. "…Really?" "Of course." "Yay! Tatsuha-kun, you're the best friend ever! A lot of times, people don't like my movies, but you do!" The singer tackled Tatsuha onto the couch, laughing so hard he shook, while Tatsuha barely managed to keep himself under control.**

**Tatsuha quietly turned "The Fox and the Hound" off, setting the remote down with a sigh. Ryuichi's head was lying on his shoulder; Tatsuha didn't dare move. Stealing a look at his love's face, the teen smiled. Ryuichi's mouth was open slightly, air rushing past his perfect lips. Tatsuha couldn't help but stare. The vocalist was beautiful; absolutely perfect, and Tatsuha wanted nothing more than to be a part of it. **_**'But…' **_**Tatsuha brushed back Ryuichi's bangs, and the singer jammed his thumb in his mouth, **_**'…It's not possible. He's so far away… mentally, and in age. I couldn't keep up… could I?' **_**"And besides…" Tatsuha spoke aloud, "What if he doesn't even like me? That's what I'm afraid of most. To him, I'm just a bumbling teenager, just a playmate… He doesn't want to be my lover." Ryuichi's breathing quickened suddenly, and Tatsuha nearly jumped when the vocalist's arms were wrapped around his middle. Once he'd gotten comfortable, the sleeping Ryuichi sighed, murmuring Tatsuha's name. The monk held baited breath as the other man lay still, and finally patted his head, getting settled in.**

"**My first night in his house… heh. I'm in no hurry, Ryu-chan. I'll make you fall in love with me sooner or later. I mean, how can you not love me?" Tatsuha laughed softly at his poke at the Uesugis. Taking a moment to gaze into Ryuichi's closed eyes, he finally noticed the faint laugh lines circling his chocolate eyes. Even without makeup, the older man was absolutely beautiful. Tatsuha almost dared to kiss Ryuichi's slightly parted lips, but instead clutched the blanket that the singer had given him. "…I'm so happy."**


End file.
